Punk's Not Dad
Interview in Cardiff Dempseys with Bones

Last Saturday was a rarety for me as I spent an evening in Cardiff's trendiest nightclub "Dempseys". It's the place where normally all the Principality's fashion elite strut their stuff (think New York, 1970's, Studio 54), however tonight it had been taken over by those loveable rogues "Punks Not Dad" for the launch party of their debut album "We are the Dads".

Accompanied by my trusty sidekick "The Pitman", and a newcomer to the Cardiff punk scene "Mad Helen", I managed to corner the boys for a quick interview backstage, unfortunately along with their Svengali-like manager Bernie Maclaren...

Lucy: Your band have been quite quiet for the last few months. Are you looking forward to playing gigs again?
Katie Jane Garside: I think I give very obtuse ans
I realise that you are all now world-renowned rock stars but just for the record can you introduce the band members and what they actually do.

BERNIE MACLAREN (Manager): OK – but you’ll have to give me a minute to check the band’s MySpace site. They’re obviously so mega-famous now that they have other people who are paid to remember their names for them. They’re far too busy recording tip-top dad-punk anthems and having a nice sit down afterwards. Ok, here we go…

Sid Life Crisis – shouting

Joe Strimmer – bass and Horlicks duty

Johnny Cardigan – guitar and…er…that’s it

Adrian Viles - banging

Your much anticipated debut album "We are the Dads" is released tonight and looks like rivalling "Dark Side of the Moon" in its chart longevity. Tell us about the record and how you came to make it.

JOE: We had thought of calling it “Smoking a Pipe at the Gates of Dawn” or “A Momentary Lapse of Continence” in honour of the old hippies – but thought better of it.

SID: The whole thing was recorded and pretty much mixed in a single weekend. Including breaks for Chocolate Hobnobs and tea. Many of the tracks had never even been rehearsed or played live until we met up in the studio. Trying to keep things as “instant” as possible is always something we’ve tried to aim for – in the classic punk tradition.

ADRIAN: That and, of course, having our every sexual whim catered for by an army of adoring underwear models. We’ve always been ambitious…

Your single "In My Shed" has been chosen as the theme song to National Shed Week, how on earth did that happen?

JOHNNY: That’s a good question. We’re not entirely sure ourselves! It can all be traced back to a chap called Uncle Wilco – the country’s chief “Sheddist” and creator of the Readers’ Sheds website - www.readersheds.co.uk. He kinda took a shine to us.

SID: Wilco even popped up tonight at our launch gig/party and guested on backing vocals for “In Me Shed”! That man will do anything to promote his shed-slanted view of the world. His mind is protected by roofing felt. The track has proved so popular that we decided to release it as a single from the album. 79p download from Amazon/iTunes to you guv….

It has been said that the delectable Lisa Rogers only appeared in the video because you have some compromising pictures and were blackmailing her. Any comment?

ADRIAN: You don’t need Punks Not Dad to get hold of compromising Lisa Rogers pictures! Just try Googling!

JOE: Seriously though, we met her doing a radio show and then used charm, tact and the promise of writing a new song solely about her in order to get her to do it. Then we forgot all about that once we had her trapped!

SID: There is a rumour that of the 13,000 people that’ve seen the video on YouTube (see below) 12,987 of ‘em hit the ‘stop’ button after the first 90 seconds once Lisa had finished her intro. But we don’t believe a word of it.


Apparently TV Smith of famed '70's punk band The Adverts had something to say about one of the tracks......

JOHNNY: Track 4 is a song about Sid’s teenage fantasy and all-time top punkette pin-up Gaye Advert. We wrote to TV Smith, who’s on the same label as us, and told him we had a track called “Gaye Adverts Eyes”. He listened to it and called it, quote, “Genius!” It doesn’t get much better than that!

JOE: Gaye herself was also flattered apparently – but singularly failed to come up with a decent, quotable phrase for us to shamelessly peddle in order to increase sales.

JOHNNY: Yeah, Sid’s still getting over that…

How do the fans get their hands on a copy of the album?

BERNIE MACLAREN: Well, I have a few copies in the back of the car. I could just…

ADRIAN: Oi Bernie! Bog off!

SID: We always advise our fans to ignore everything that Bernie ever says – especially when it comes to parting with their hard-earned! You can get the album on CD or download from Amazon, www.punksnotdad.co.uk or direct from our label Boss Tuneage/XFist at www.bosstuneage.com. You can also get it on iTunes – but download only obviously.

JOE: I should point out that Sid only knows about mp3’s, downloads and sh*t cos his 12 year-old nephew sat him down and explained it to him. Sid’s calls to the record company for wax cylinder format release fell on deaf ears.

Would you like to comment on the rumours that the band is somehow implicated in the death of Michael Jackson?

BERNIE MACLAREN: Deny everything!

JOHNNY: Chill out Bernie! They can’t prove a thing…

SID: Actually, inspired by Wacko, Johnny had wondered whether, in the event of his death, he could leave his own kids to be reared by Diana Ross.

ADRIAN: Either that or Poly Styrene…

JOHNNY: You f*ckin rotter!

I believe you've now got your own merchandising (like a proper band). Where can I get a Punks Not Dad tie or babygrow then?

JOE: No, it’s true! And again, in the great punk tradition, anyone can do it! Sid’s nephew helped us set it up ourselves on the ol’ interweb thingy. There’s a whole host of Punks Not Dad themed merchandise available from www.punksnotdad.spreadshirt.net.

JOHNNY: Including Tshirts, hoodies, and baby-grows with “The Filth & the Puree” emblazoned on ‘em! All good quality gear.

BERNIE MACLAREN: Of course, the boys are only in it for the music.

SID: While you Bernie are only in it for the moolah! You old git…

Exactly what was your reasons for turning down the chance to headline Glastonbury above Bruce Springsteen?

ADRIAN: Well, we’d heard that old Brucie was going to be paying tribute to Joe Strummer – so it didn’t seem right somehow.

SID: Anyway – Glasto’s a sh*thole!

JOHNNY: Yeah, last time I went I tried to sit on my handy shooting stick to watch something at the “IndieShoeGazerUnderTwentiesJingleJangle Stage”. Before I knew it I’d sunk in the mud up to me cardie!

SID: What’s the point of playing in front of 10,000 people in a field when you could be playing to 50 people in the Cardiff Barfly?… er… mmm…. oh….

What are your immediate plans and where can your adoring fans see you next?

JOE: Well, next gig is, ironically enough, back at the Cardiff Barfly with our old pals the Sex Pistols Experience. After that, we’re playing a one-off in the foyer of the Cardiff Millennium Centre Cardiff on 21st July. That should be a laugh!

ADRIAN: Yeah, us and the Llanelli Male Voice Choir…

JOE: Hey - those guys rock! OK, they might have taken a somewhat suspect musical direction – but they’re true Dads. And the Dads are alright!

SID: Apart from that, we’re working on the next single. It’s likely to be our new song in homage to the trials and tribulations of trying to assemble IKEA bedroom furniture. It’s called “I Can’t Get It Up”…

Anything else you'd like to say?

BERNIE MACLAREN: I’d just like to say grfffr… nnggg… gggnfph…

(at this point Sid and Joe attempted to ram a fortuitously adjacent gardening glove into the mouth of their beloved manager)

ADRIAN: Would just like to thank everyone who came to “Dadstock” to help us celebrate the launch of our album and remind everyone that the single “In Me Shed” is now available for download. Let’s all get it to number one!

JOHNNY: Oh, and also that we’re now in the process of looking for new management. I know this bloke called Malcolm Rhodes…



wers to questions...It's never about looking forward to it. Actually maybe I should change the
script, maybe we are looeir musicm the 3rd album?