THE VIEW- Hold on now/ Tacky tattoo

A story from The View's biog filled me with hope at first: 'Falconer was entertaining his band mates performing handstands in the kitchen of his flat. He lost balance, he recalls with a cackle, toppled and crashed down into an open dishwasher, impaling his foot on a carving knife. Bassist Kieren Webster took a photo of the resulting injury. It is a close-up of Falconer's left foot - the handle of the knife protruding from the ball, the blade buried three inches into it.'

He survived… Anyway, surely The View's single has been put into my postbag for a jokey. After all, being the true meaning of Shitpop, I hate Kyle Falconer's being almost as much as Sheeran's. And it pains me for being so unoriginal to even use the phrase but somehow a lack of thought for what I'm writing seems apt here. But what does it matter? Someone, somewhere is still buying such total utter crap -(by rights, these people should have crosses painted on their doors or something but I guess those days are gone now).

Or am I being unreasonable? Because we should be impressed that The View's album 'Cheeky for a reason', from whence these songs were taken, was produced by the same man responsible for Arctic Monkeys and was in the top 10 (whatever that means). And the NME can't be wrong in their comparisons of these cheeky Scots to the early Libertines (er, what?).

Nope, I still loathe The View with a passion so great that I cannot begin to put it into words. But I'll try. Because, ever the brave reviewer, I did listen to 'Hold on now'. And unfortunately it sounds like The View. There's a shouty chorus bit in it. That's the really shit bit, rivalled only by the double A-side to this double A-side, which reads as 'The girl with the tacky tattoo is the one you shouldn't do/ It will only lead to trouble if it fails' over mock-soulful vocals. Boastingly inspired by drinking too much alcohol, and written when being 'smashed', The View just have to be tongue in cheek. Because when I drink to excess, I generally want to put my head in a toilet and leave it there, not haul it out and record a fricking song about it. As the CD came to an abrupt end, there was a guttural cry of 'Who f-ing listens to this band anyway?' The answer being: idiots. Whoever said 'I believe the children are our future' has a lot to answer for.

This man sums up this release better than I ever could. Possibly funniest thing that I have ever read:

Anna C

Released 3rd December, 2012.
(I wish they were).