Upper-Fourth At Filory-Towers
A Parody
Olivia! Is that you? Olivia, over here!
Katie grabbed her bags from the car and dashed off to
meet Olivia in the crowd. It was the first day of the new term at
Filory Towers and chaos reigned as the girls arrived at the gates.
They were all carrying tottering piles of suitcases and gym kits and
shouting at the top of their voices in their excitement at seeing
each other again after the long summer..
Oh look Olivia, heres Rachel. Rachel! Over
here! Im dying to see what new pranks youve got to play
this term!
Hallo Katie. Youre in for a treat! My brothers
got me this amazing set of tricks for my birthday, see. Theres
a fantastic one I want to play on Madame Chausson. And there are some
brilliant tips on overthrowing the corrupt capitalist system too.
Golly that sounds fun. I cant wait!
The three friends made their way in to find Matron.
She was stern but always fair and the girls liked her tremendously.
Its good to see you all again. I hope youre ready
for fourth year youll have exams at the end of the term
so therell be plenty of work to do.
We know Matron, Katie grinned, Theres exams,
the tennis tournament and the Stop the Racists demo to organise. Goodness
its going to be a busy term!
Youve all got brains and a firm sense of mistrust for
scaremongering politicians. So Im sure youll do very well
indeed.
The girls took their bags up to their new fourth-year dormitory. Gwendolyn
was already there. There was also a new girl with short brown hair
and an anarchist badge who was unpacking her things from her case
hairbrush, tennis racket and anti-racist placards. She introduced
herself as Susan.
Im so looking forward to my first term at Filory Towers!
Youve got quite wonderful tennis courts and much better grass-roots
anti-racism activism than at my old school.
I expect well get along just splendidly, Rachel
said with a grin.
Personally, I think foreigners arent to be trusted.
Gwendolyn sniffed. England should be for the English.
The girls stared at her.
Gwen, youre Japanese.
*****
The first few weeks flew by. Not for the first time,
Katie was glad that she had a friend like hardworking little Olivia.
Honestly, without you Liv I dont know how I would have
written these chants for the demo. Scum, scum scum! It
has such a wonderful rhythm to it. Would you be a dear and help me
with my Latin prep, now?
With the big anti-racism protest looming, the girls decided to have
a Midnight demo prep session. Susan managed to get the key to the
sports equipment shed and Katie liberated some pies from the tyranny
of private ownership in the school kitchens for them to eat.
Everyone but Gwendolyn was invited.
Whispering and giggling they made their way down to the shed in the
middle of the night. Susan unlocked the shed with only the barest
of squeaks and they filed in. Rachel had a surprise for the others
shed managed to smuggle her mothers megaphone into
school in her case that would do splendidly for the demo. The
girls munched away at their sardine paste sandwiches, sewing banners
and copying out the leaflets Katie had designed.
The next day Gwen seemed a little suspicious that all the other girls
kept yawning in classes. Katie felt a little guilty so she offered
Gwen some of the left over potato pie that evening in their dormitory.
Oh no, I dont eat potatoes, everyone knows theyre
a vile foreign import. Gwen wrinkled her nose. I only
eat wholesome patriotic food like pineapples, chicken tikka and Chinese
egg rolls.
Everyone else sidled out of the room slowly.
*****
The day of the demo finally arrived. The leaflets had
been distributed, posters pasted across the town and French dictation
done early.
Katie warmed up her singing voice as they made their way to the town
centre. Ave Maria Gratia plena. There are many many more of
us than you.
The girls were delighted to see that only a handful of racist thugs
had come out to demonstrate. They greeted the police officers, unfurled
their handstitched banners and began yelling anti-racist slogans.
Rachel gave Katie the megaphone and sang her heart out using anti-racist
lyrics to the tune of popular songs.
Bravo, Katie! The crown cheered. To whom do these
streets belong? Us! To whom does this town belong? Us! To whom does
this city belong? Us!
Scum scum scum! Off our steets, Olivia shouted. Good
day Mrs Peterson. Would you like any help carrying your shopping basket?
Soon enough the motley racist group dispersed to cheers from the Filory-towers
girls.
Goodness, what a day! Katie grinned. And what beautiful
weather for it! I should just love to get some liquorice from the
sweet shop before we head back. This way around the police blockade,
Susan.
Laughing and flushed with their success, the girls made their way
back to the school. On the road back they saw Gwendolyn looking at
them with admiration.
I say, you are quite a good bunch arent you. Ive
been such a silly all term. Can you accept my apology? I should very
much like to help you with the next demo if youd have me?
Of course Gwen! Katie smiled. Theres always
a place for the kind at heart in the Upper-forth at Filory-towers.
Habiba Islam